


Itami no hanabira

by ArunPharyn



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Hanahaki Disease, Happy ending maybe??, Homophobic Society, I felt like Morgana and Akira should have more heart-to-hearts, Insecurity, M/M, Maybe. Dunno yet., so here we go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-12-13 03:17:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11750949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArunPharyn/pseuds/ArunPharyn
Summary: He never asked for this. He never asked to fall in love- he believed that with what he was doing, love would only be a hindrance. He still stands by it as he watches his artist friend delicately paint on the canvas, knowing that his life was ticking away. It bothers him, knowing he can't do anything about it except to just let it take his life.





	1. Kakusu

**June 6th, 20XX**

Akira sighed as he was tending to his plant, halfway listening to Morgana gush about how his ‘Lady Ann’ was such a ‘meowvelous and beautiful’ girl, even after they stole their second treasure.

“Morgana... “ Akira sighed softly in annoyance, “I have a question.”

“Yeah? What is it?” The cat looked up at Akira, looking shocked that his newfound friend had more emotion in it than usual.

“Why exactly do you love Ann so much? While, yes, she is aesthetically pleasing to look at, wouldn’t it make more sense to try and get to know her before trying to get to be with her?” Akira paused his hand movements as he thought, “What if she’s not who you think she is?”

“A-Are you telling me to stop liking her? Wait… Do you like Lady Ann too!?” Morgana gasped slightly as his hair fluffed slightly.  
< br / >  
“Um, no…” Akira frowned at his feline friend. “I really was just wondering… Isn’t it dangerous to love in a position like this?”

“.. What do you mean?” Morgana shifted, looking down as he thought about what Akira was implying.

“... If someone were to find out our true identities, wouldn’t they be able to use our loved ones against us..?” Akira’s comment made Morgana frown.

“So that’s what this is about…?” Morgana sighed softly and walked over to Akira, “Look, Joker…. Yes, if people know who we are, they can use who we love as something against us… But, even so, humans are social creatures. If we don’t socialize, we’ll be depressed and we won’t be able to do our jobs correctly.”

“... Would it be worth it, though?” Akira frowns, “If the one you love is hurt, or even killed because of you… Would the pain be worth it..?”

“Akira… That’s honestly for someone to decide on their own…” Morgana sighed softly, “I believe we should at least try for happiness. But, what you decide is what you decide.”

“... Right…” Akira sighed as he resumed in tending to the plant, now halfway disinterested. “Sorry for bringing it up…”

“Don’t be! After all, I’m the perfect one to go to when talking about love!” Morgana grinned, prompting Akira to look at him blankly before turning away once again.

“...Right... “ Akira honestly had to pull all of his will power into not turning his expression into disbelief.

“Now, Akira, I have a question for _you_!” Morgana grinned cheekily at Akira.

“... Should I be scared?” Akira sweatdropped slightly, not even having to look at his feline friend to know that that familiar grin would be on his face.

“Do you have any interests in any girls you know??” Akira sighed, shaking his head at Morgana.

“No… I don’t really like anyone in that way, to be perfectly honest.” He shrugged, making Morgana pout.

“Awh… You’re no fun, Akira…”

“Stop acting like a little kid, Morgana…” Akira huffed as he patted his hands together to clear the dirt off of them.

“No one..? Really…?”

“I lived in a small town with not many people my age before coming here, where it seems like everyone hates me. I’m sorry for not having a love life that you can gossip about.” Morgana frowned at his friend at that comment, hopping onto the bed.

“Akira… You know that not everyone thinks you’re a bad person… I know you’re a good guy… Lady Ann knows, that knucklehead knows, and even Yusuke does, even if he hasn’t been with us for long…” That comment urged Akira to look over.

“Oh… I know you guys don’t think that about me… But as I’ve said, I don’t really like Ann like that, and any other girl out there either doesn’t know who I am, or hates me because of my criminal record.” Akira headed towards the stairs. “I’m going to go wash my hands. Go ahead and head off to sleep without me tonight.” He told his friend before heading down, slouching slightly as usual.

“….” Morgana frowned slightly before curling up in bed, Deciding to wait for Akira, knowing he would feel a bit guilty the next morning. It wasn’t long before Akira came back up and got into bed himself, letting himself relax in the comforter next to Morgana. “So, Akira…”

“What…?” Akira looked over at the cat basically next to the side of his head.

“Do you think I was loved when I was a human…? That.. There are people who are wondering where I am now, worried for me?” Morgana frowned at his thoughts. “Do you think that I have anywhere to go to when I do become what I was before…?”  
“... That’s a tough question for me to answer, Morgana.” Akira frowned softly in thoughtfulness. “If… If you were anything like you are now, I’d say someone would definitely be worried about you.” He smiled at him encouragingly. “I, for one, definitely know that if I were in their position, I would be extremely worried, and I’d still be looking for you with all my heart.”

“Really…?” Morgana smiled sadly. “... I really hope that I have something to go back to when I turn back into a human…”

“I’m sure you will, Morgana. And… Even if you didn’t, you could always stay with me, you know.”

“Akira…..” Morgana smiled in gratefulness. “I won’t ever forget this, okay?” Akira nodded in response.

“You better not. Now, I know this is a bit of a role reversal, but it’s time to go to sleep. Like seriously, I’m tired.” Akira huffed, making Morgana chuckle slightly.

“Alright, alright. I don’t need to be told twice.” He laid his head down and closed his eyes, drifting to sleep. Akira, however, stared up at the ceiling, deep in thought about their conversation from earlier. _‘Love, huh…? Is there really a reason for it?’_ Akira wondered briefly. _‘While, yes, having friends and all are nice… Are they really necessary..? I guess… we really do gotta choose for ourselves…. If it is worth the inevitable pain in the end, where you break up or one of you end up dying..?.... Egh, you know what? I don’t want to think about it now. Too deep for this late in the night/’_ Akira sighed as he covered his eyes, falling into a dreamless sleep, not being bothered by the old, long-nosed man that frequently visited his dreams.


	2. Fuka

Akira was just waiting for the train when he was approached by a girl.  
  
“Hello, Kurusu-kun.” She smiled at the male, who just blinked.  
  
“Do I… Know you?”  
  
“Oh, forgive me. My name is Makoto Niijima, I am the student council president of Shujin academy.” She introduced herself, “I just want to ask you some questions.”  
  
“Okay…?” Akira frowned slightly.  
  
“I’ve noticed that you’ve been laying low ever since Madarame has held his press conference. May I ask why..?”  
  
“... I’ve been acting the same as usual…” Akira sighed slightly before bringing the crook of his arm to his face, slightly coughing. “If I haven’t it may be because I haven’t been feeling all that well lately…”  
  
“Hm.. It’s not flu season, though…” Makoto frowned.  
  
“I know… People can get sick when it’s not flu season, though, you know..? I, myself, get sick whenever a string of _something_ gets in the air.” Akira shrugged at the girl.  
  
“Hm… Interesting.” She nodded as she thought.  
  
“Well… The train’s about to come in, so… I’ll see you in the hallways or whatever.”  
  
“Alright.” She smiled as she watched Akira leave before following herself.  
  
  
  
  
“Akira…? Are you sure you’re alright?” Morgana spoke from the bag when Akira walked up the stairs. “You’ve honestly been pale today, you know… We can’t let our leader be sick!”  
  
“I’ll be fine, Morgana…” The leader set the cat and the bag down on his bed. “I’m going to go to Takemi’s Clinic. I don’t know for how long, but if you want, afterwards, we’ll get you some sushi?” He offered, knowing he had plenty of yen to spare for his feline friend. Just as he predicted, Morgana’s ears perked up as he hopped out of the bag.  
  
“S-Sushi?” The cat grinned slightly, thinking about the food he will taste later. “W-Well, what are you waiting for??? Go get yourself checked out!” The cat urged, making Akira chuckle fondly.  
  
“Right, right. Don’t miss me too much.” He descended down the stairs, heading towards the clinic that was just down the street from him.  
  
  
“Oh, hello, Akira.” Tae looked over at her ‘guinea pig’. “Will you be participating in another trial?” She asked, “I believe we’re about to have another breakthrough.”  
  
“Sorry, Takemi, but I’ve come for another reason. If.. That’s okay, of course.”  
  
“Hm… Now that I think about it, you don’t look quite so well.” Takemi nodded and stood up. “Meet me in the room to your right.” She walked over, Akira shortly following to the exam room. “What seems to be the problem?” The doctor asked as she sat down on her chair, watching as her usual guinea pig sat across from her.  
  
“Well… It’s this.” Akira brought out a bag that was hidden in his pocket. It’s contents were two white flower petals.  
  
“These flower petals?”  
  
“Yes. I.. coughed them up, last night…” Akira frowned, “It… hurt, a lot.” He commented.  
  
“... Are you sure that you actually coughed them up, and they didn’t come from your flower job?” Takemi frowned as she thought.  
  
“I felt it as they landed in my hands. I’m pretty sure I did.” Akira crossed his arms. “I know I have the Hanahaki Disease.”  
  
“... Then what do you expect me to do?” Tae took the bag out of Akira’s hands, inspecting it. “You know that, after decades of research, there still hasn’t been a remedy to these flowers, other than having the patients love be reciprocated.” She pointed out.  
  
“I was wondering if you could try and make a medicine that lessens the pain, or even makes it easier to hold down my coughing. And make a huge amount of it.”  
  
“Are you not planning on telling who you like?” Takemi looked at him, a bit shocked. Akira shook his head.  
  
“No. H… She obviously likes another guy… When she rejects me, I’ll die immediately, won’t I? And, before you ask, I’m not getting that surgery to make me forget her.”  
  
“.. Do you love her too much..?” At that comment, Akira… scowled…  
  
“Hell no. If I could forget her, I would immediately go through with the surgery.” He sighed, regaining his normal composure. “There are… certain circumstances that I can’t risk. She’s a big part of my life, and if I suddenly forget her, it’ll be obvious to everyone around.” He reasoned, figuring that that was close enough to the truth.  
  
“Would you rather die because of her…?” Tae asked, honestly shocked that this situation would happen to _her_ guinea pig.  
  
“... I have to. But, when I do, I want it to be when I’m back in my hometown. That’s why I need to have a supply of whatever you can get so that my death will be delayed until I go to my hometown.” The serious expression told Takemi that she should just give him what he wanted, making her sigh reluctantly.  
  
“Alright. I believe I can think of a concoction for you. If you’re willing to, whenever you cough up those petals, may you bring them to me? It may help me with making your medication.” Akira nodded in response.  
  
“Sure thing. When I feel better, I’ll push myself even harder in those trials, okay?”  
  
“Of course. I would expect no less from _you_ , my little guinea pig.” Takemi smiled at him, watching him stand. “I should have it ready in two days. Please, do try to go easy on yourself until then.” She suggested.  
  
“Yeah. Thanks, doc.” Akira smiled over at the doctor as he walked out of the room.  
  
  
“Hey Akira! You’re back!!” Morgana hopped into the bag. “Come on, come on!!” He urged, making the male chuckle again.  
  
“We’re going, we’re going.” He answered, smiling as he watched his feline friend get overly excited about sushi. He grabbed a hold of the strap and slung over his shoulder before heading off towards the store.  
  
“Will we be getting fatty tuna???”  
  
“Yes, we’re getting you fatty tuna, Morgana.”


	3. Shinpai Suru

“..Akira…?” It had been a couple of weeks since Akira had first gone to the doctor for his illness, and Morgana was starting to get worried about their leader, now that they had a girl blackmailing them into doing what she wanted. Akira looked over at his feline friend after taking the desired amount of the solution he had been given, his face a bit contorted from the bitterness of it, but still gave Morgana a smile, despite everything going on in their lives.

“Yeah..?” He walked over to the sink of the cafe, washing it out thoroughly, appreciating the quietness that the scenery gave off after closing time.

“...Will you be alright?” Morgana asked, frowning, “You’re taking that medication a lot… Shouldn’t you be worried about overdosing? A-And, do you even know why you’re taking the medicine in the first place?”

“... Are you worried about me?” Akira teased the cat with a smirk as he looked over.

“W-Wha-Of course I am! You’re our leader! We can’t function without our leader, and I still need you to go through Mementos!” The cat hissed softly. “Wait-don’t change the subject!” Morgana scolded. “At least answer if you’re alright… And look me in the eyes while you’re saying it!” He commanded, making the leader sigh and chuckle. Akira looked into his cats eyes after turning off the sink.

“I, Akira Kurusu, will be fine enough to go into Mementos and finish what I started. That is why I’m taking this medicine in the first place.” He poked his feline friend on the head playfully, “Be glad I’m willing to suffer through this taste for you.” The cat hissed slightly in response to the poke before replying to Akira’s commitment.

“So you’ll be ‘fine enough’?” Morgana frowned, “Why aren’t you going to be completely fine?”

“I guess these trips to the Metaverse are a bit too much on my body.” Akira shrugs slightly, going back to cleaning his medicine cup, which, now, was just drying it up with a clean rag. However, he didn’t get to do that part just yet.

“No! You have to keep looking me in the eyes!” Morgana hissed, slightly scratching at Akira, not drawing any blood, but enough to get Akira to send a glare at him.

“I’m probably not my best because of the Metaverse trips, jeez, Morgana.” Akira huffed, looking at Morgana’s eyes before going back to drying the cup, which was quickly finished. He started back upstairs, ignoring Morgana’s yowling.

“Hey, wait- Akira!! Joker!!”

  
  
“Hey, why won’t you tell me the truth..? As your mentor, I can’t condone this!” Morgana hissed, making Akira roll his eyes.

“Who made you my mentor..?”

“I did! Now actually tell me the truth! I know that the Metaverse won’t have negative effects on you in the real world, so don’t try to give me that crap again!” Morgana jumped on Akira’s shoulder, biting his ear, “Tell meeee!!”

“Ow-ow-Stop that!” Akira grabbed his friend and put him on the bed, “Jeez, you’re getting to be really annoying right now…” He huffed.

“I could say the same to you! You have to tell me what’s going on! No one else is getting sick from the Metaverse, and you’re supposed to be in good health! Like you said, I’m worried about you, Akira!” Morgana softened his glare, “Can you please just tell me??”

“Huh, you actually said ‘please’.” Akira pointed out, making Morgana hiss.

“Okay, stop being an asshole and tell me, asshole.” He retorted, “Do you want me to get Lady Ann, Ryuji and Yusuke on your case?” He could tell that question got to Akira, seeing the boy tense up.

“You wouldn’t…”

“I would! As soon as I get a chance, I’ll tell them there’s something you’re hiding from them and even me! That would surely get them interested, wouldn’t it?” Morgana narrowed his eyes. Akira had gone silent, and with Morgana’s cat eyes, he could clearly see a bead of sweat roll down Akira’s face. Once he finally spoke up, though…

“I think you’re the real asshole here, Morgana. Blackmailing me into telling you something that I am obviously uncomfortable with? Yeah, great way of showing me that we’re friends.” Akira crossed his arms, sitting down on his bed.

“I wouldn’t have to do that if you’d just tell me in the first place!” Morgana pointed out, walking over to Akira and placing his head in the human's lap. “It would be better for the both of us if you just told me what’s going on.” That statement caused the silence to continue, past the point where it was deafening. Morgana looked up at Akira’s face, immediately being able to tell that their leader was deep in thought, eyes showing that he wasn’t completely there and teeth worrying his bottom lip. The feline friend decided to let Akira be, waiting for his thought process to be over.

….

…..

……

“..Hrngh!” Morgana jumped away as soon as he heard Akira stifled coughs, which soon became unbearable to the boy as his coughing sounded in the once completely silent attic.

“A-Akira!? Are you okay!? C-Calm down, now..!” Morgana placed his right paw on Akira’s lap in worry. “T-Try to breathe, okay!?” His panic was rising as Akira’s coughing got harsher, but it was soon joined by confusion as he saw pure white petals flying out of the coughing boy’s mouth. He had to shake it off, though, deciding that getting Akira to stop coughing was more important.

  
  
  
  
“There we go… Are you alright..?” Morgana asked when Akira’s coughing diminished to just heavy breathing and gulps. It took a bit, but Akira was able to shakily nod.

“Y-Yeah, I’m…. ugh- oh _god_ that royally sucked.” Akira sucked in a breath before looking at the petals scattered on the floor and his lap, watching as Morgana hopped down to inspect the petals.

“... Why… did you cough these up? Is this why you were taking that medicine?” Morgana asked, frowning slightly.

“... I have a… rare disease, Morgana. Called the ‘Hanahaki Disease’, which causes me to cough these petals up, and when it develops more, I’ll be coughing up whole flower heads…” Akira sighed softly, figuring that he couldn’t get out of telling Morgana, now that he had seen one of his episodes.

“And the medicine…? Will it cure you?” Akira shook his head at the question.

“No. The medicine is for the pain, so that my life won’t be agonizing. There’s also no cure for it- at least, none that I can use right now.” Akira shrugged, making Morgana frown.

“Why can’t you…?”

“If I go through with the only cure, which is some kind of surgery, it will take a day or two at most for them to do what they need to do to my body. And after that, it will take about two weeks time for me to recover from the operation, which is time we don’t have right now.” Akira reasoned, “I’m also not planning on getting the surgery done any time soon, even after we find this guy and change his heart.”

“Wha- Why!?” Morgana sucked in a breath out of worriness.

“If something happens that needs immediate attention, I need to be there. I can’t do that if I’m in the hospital, drugged outta my mind to keep my mind off the pain.” Akira sighed, “That’s why you need to promise me that you won’t tell Ann, Ryuji or Yusuke. If word gets to them, I don’t think it’ll matter to them whether or not something Phantom Thief related comes up…”

“... You’re right… Okay, I won’t tell anyone. But, please, if something goes wrong with this ‘Hanamuki Disease’, or whatever it’s called-”

“Hanahaki.”

“-yeah, whatever, just try to take it easy… It doesn’t matter if it’s in the real world or in the Metaverse. You can take a break in the real world, and if we’re in the Metaverse, I’ll pick up the slack for you! Just try to not push yourself to the point where you break…”

“I know, I know…” Akira sighed, bending down to pick up the petals, Morgana helping putting them into a pile. Akira walked over to one of his drawers and pulled out a plastic baggie, causing Morgana to tilt his head in confusion.

“What are you doing?”

“The doctor over at that clinic has been using my petals as samples to research more about the Hanahaki Disease. She’s hoping to find an alternate medicine that can heal me without having to go through the long process of the surgery.” Akira quickly put the petals into the bag. “Well, I’m heading out to bring these to Takemi.” He informed the cat, heading down.

“Alright, be safe!” Morgana called out, hearing the bell of the door chime as Akira exited. He hopped back onto the bed, curling up, thinking. _’So, this Hanahaki Disease… It’s why he was so pale for those couple of weeks, right…? I thought he was getting better, but… What he was saying made it sound like it was just going to get progressively worse… To the point where he will be coughing up whole flower heads…’_ Morgana recapped in his mind, frowning. _’But...Is this Hanahaki Disease lethal..?'_ He wondered, becoming even more concerned. _'Well, I guess it would make sense, he could suffocate on the flowers as he’s coughing… Oh god… Is he going to die because of us..? We’re preventing him from getting help…’_ Morgana buried his face into the comforter, trying to quiet his thoughts, not wanting to think about the possibility of Akira dying, whether or not it’s because of them, even though he knew that, with what they were doing, there was a high chance that one of them could die. Hell, there had already been way too many close calls in the Metaverse with all of them. Times where they could stand no longer, when the appeal of falling into the black abyss after a particularly hard hit was landed on them. It scared him-always has… But he knew what he was getting into when he started. Now, though… Akira could start coughing anytime now, it seemed like, now that he was aware of it… Then again, maybe not… Morgana let out a frustrated groan. _’Wait, no, let's not get ahead of ourselves... I'm sure that if it's lethal in some way, he would've told me, right...? ........I’m just going to sleep this off… Sorry for heading to bed without you, Akira…’_

  
  
  
  
“... A patient came over today, wanting a prescription for some glasses.” Takemi complained softly to the boy who just came in, “I’m no eye doctor though… Maybe he thought so because I have that eye chart over there?”

“Yeah, why do you have that?”

“No idea, to be honest. So, are you here for a clinical trial?” Akira shook his head at the doctor’s question.

“No.. I have some samples for you.” Takemi stared at him for a bit before nodding. “Right. Well, go head into the exam room.” She instructed, gathering her clipboard before walking over, Akira following.

  
  
“That’s.. More than usual… Are you sure you’re taking your medication I gave you?” Takemi asked, looking at the almost overfilled bag with curiosity.

“Yeah, I have…” Akira frowned, “I just… Had an attack, today.”

“...Were you in any kind of stress?” The doctor interrogated, watching Akira frown slightly.

“Yeah… One of my… friends were getting on my case about it, wondering why I was taking the medicine and why I was so pale now… But, I wasn’t really thinking about who I liked, so why..?” Takemi sighed and shook her head.

“Your anxiety probably triggered this attack. You have a lot of stress on yourself, being a teenager and being expected to do what you’re doing flawlessly, knowing that what your teachers are teaching you will probably not benefit you in any way in your future, if you even have a future in the first place…” She opened the baggie and put some on something that seemed like a plastic plate, inspecting them. “That coupled with your friend getting ‘on your case’, as you put it, was probably too much for you to handle, instigating this attack.” She looked back at him. “How’s your chest?”

“It’s sore, but.. Nothing I can’t handle.” Akira shrugged, a hand coming up to his chest. “... How long do you think I have, realistically..?” He was hesitant to ask, frowning even more when he saw Takemi do so as well.

“If things are progressing as quickly as they are now, I would be surprised if you lasted through the summer.” She honestly admitted. “With this many petals coming up at one time, you’ll be coughing up whole heads soon… Once that happens, there’s more of a possibility that you can choke and die on them during any one of your attacks.”

“So, just a couple of months..?” Akira shakily sighed, “Is there… Any way you can prolong it..?”

“... I can give you a stronger solution than the one you’re taking right now, but… It’s technically some kind of weed killer, but if I give you it, we may be doing more harm than good to your body.” Takemi frowned, “I was already hesitant enough to give you what you have now.” She informed him, making Akira deflate slightly.

“Oh… So, you really can’t do anything else..?”

“I’m sorry, Akira… The only thing that I can suggest is going through with the surgery, but I know you can’t.” Takemi sighed.

“... If anyone can make a cure for this, it’s you.” Akira stated, making Takemi shake her head sadly.

“Even this is beyond my capabilities, Akira. There have been many brilliant doctors, more so than I, who’ve poured their heart and souls into finding another way to cure the Hanahaki Disease, and yet the only cures are to go through the surgery, or to have the object of your affections return your feelings.” She sighed, “I’m not a miracle worker, I’m just a general practitioner. Trying to rely on me to save your life would mean death for you.” She stated, looking at Akira seriously, who just sighed.

“... I’m sorry. For… Putting the pressure on you.” He stood, “Well, that’s all I had to talk about.. See ya when you need me, or when I cough up some more damned flowers.” He walked away and out the door. Takemi stared at the door before turning her gaze at the petals, letting her expression show what she was really feeling- Heartbreaking sadness.

“....Not another one… Miwa-chan.. and now Akira-kun… They’re both…” She sniffled softly, hands reaching out to put the flowers back in the baggie. She sighed heavily once that was done with. “...I need a drink…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I _know_ this story has been dragging for these past few chapters, but I _promise_ it will be getting interesting! Just hang in there with me, will ya?
> 
> Also, school just started today, so.... stress :| Sigh...


	4. Isoide

**July 17, 20XX**

  
Akira sighed as he looked at the test results, unable to hide his own disappointment as he noticed the other students finding out his own scores.

_”Of course he wouldn’t score that well, he’s a delinquent, after all!”_

_”Yeah, I don’t even know why I bothered even checking. He’s lower than even Sakamoto!”_

_’Well, excuse me for being human…’_ Akira huffed slightly, _’How’d I even fail that badly…?’_

“Wow… You got completely wrecked this time around.” Morgana unhelpfully stated, making Akira frown.

“How many times have I told you to not peek your head out at school..?” He weakly scolded as Morgana hid back into his bag. “... Makoto’s _so_ gonna kill me….”

“Is that so?” Akira almost jumped, _’and there’s the devil…’_ , before looking back at the student council president. She smiled sweetly at him before walking past him and finding his name. “.... Huh…” She frowned, “.. Let us meet later today. I would like to have a chat with you.” She walked away calmly, only making Akira even more scared of their second in command.

“Heeyy, ‘kira!” Luckily, _‘or maybe unluckily, we’ll see,’_ Ryuji walked over to his best buddy. “How’d you do?” _’Nope, it’s unluckily.’_ Akira decided as Ryuji looked at the scores. “.... Duuuude… You did even worse than me… How is that even possible…?” Ryuji frowned, looking worried. “You sure you okay, dude?” He asked, seeing that all Akira could do was shrug. He went to say something else, but the bell rang. “... Hey, can you talk with me after school?”

“Sorry. Makoto’s already got that time reserved for herself.” Akira sighed, seeming to be accepting of his demise this way.

“Damn… Sorry I couldn’t get here before her.” Ryuji’s frown turned sympathetic as he headed off towards his own class.

“So’m I…” Akira muttered as he entered the classroom, thankful that this would be a quiet period where the students could do anything, as long as they were quiet about it. _’Thank god, though…’_ He took out a book that he had gotten from the library, which talked about Arsene, his first Persona.

  
  
  
  
“I need to head home real fast to drop off my stuff.” Makoto informed Akira at the gates, having been waiting for Akira to walk out of the school grounds. Akira nodded in response, frowning slightly.

“Right…” He mumbled, watching her back as she left, swallowing nervously.

“Calm down, Akira…” Morgana reminded his friend, “Don’t work yourself up so much like last time…” Akira nodded.

“Right… Nothing.. bad’ll happen.” He tried to convince himself as he walked towards the cafe.

  
  
“Hello, again…” Makoto greeted as she came up the stairs, watching Akira studying some more. “I see you’re studying again…” She commented.

“Yeah… Well, I figured, I may as well keep all the information in my head and all…” Akira sighed, making Makoto frown and sit on the couch.

“... Did something happen?” She asked, making Akira blink in shock. “I’ve looked through your past grades before, and you seem to be an exceptional student… Which is why I’m worried about you.”

“Oh…. Well, don’t worry about it.” Akira smiled softly at Makoto, “I’ve been more stressed than I have been in the past and I suppose I’m still adjusting to it…”

“If that were the case, wouldn’t you be used to it by now? You’ve been juggling your double life pretty flawlessly, from what I’ve seen.” The student council president shifted her weight to her other foot, as she does when making a point. “That alone shouldn’t have been enough to have such a drastic change on your scores.”

“Seriously, Makoto, I’m fine.” Akira gave her a smile, ignoring the frown that was sent his way, “You can just head back home now. Or even, if you wanted to, we could keep each other company as we stud-”

“No.” Makoto’s sharp voice cut him off, silencing Akira completely. “I am going to get to the bottom of this, Kurusu Akira, and you cannot stop me.” She warned the boy, her glare becoming intense. “When I looked at your grades, I noticed that they started wavering a bit after Madarame’s confession. If I couple that with when I approached you at the trains, the first time, you stated that you hadn’t been feeling well, despite it not being flu season. I can only assume that those incidents are connected.”

“... You know, assuming things makes an ‘ass out of u and me.’”

“ _Don’t_ be a smartass with me right now, Kurusu.” Makoto hissed slightly, making Akira look to the side. “If something is wrong with your health that is affecting your ability in school, who knows if it’ll start to affect your leadership in the Metaverse?” She interrogated. Morgana decided to try and help Akira, seeing that the boy was going pale from anxiety.

“Hey, Makoto, Akira’s got everything under control-”

“No, he doesn’t.” Makoto frowned at the cat, “He needs help with whatever the hell is going on-”

“He needs _you_ to stop meddling!” Morgana frowned, “You’re just making it worse for him!”

“It can’t be considered meddling if this is my problem too! If he’s sick in any way, this affects all of us as the Thieves! You’re lucky I’m not dragging the other three here too!” Makoto turned towards Akira, “So, what do you want to do? Tell me, or force me to get Ann, Ryuji, and Yusuke to come over?” She watched as Akira gulped, his whole body tense. “Well? What’ll it be?” She took out her phone, “All I have to do is call them ove-”

“Akira!” Makoto blinked as she was interrupted by Morgana’s frantic cry. She looked over at the male, blinking as she saw that he had covered his mouth with his hands, his shoulders heaving slightly. “Try to calm your breathing!” Morgana instructed, placing his paw on Akira’s leg, only to jump back when the male’s coughing suddenly got worse. Makoto could only watch in shock as she saw petals coming through the gaps between Akira’s fingers, but she soon shook off the shock and sat next to him, patting his back to encourage coughing the unneeded flora out of his chest.

  
  
“Are you alright Akira..?” Makoto asked once the coughing had calmed down, and Akira’s breathing had returned to be somewhat normal.

“Yeah… ‘m fine…” Akira sighed softly, “...please don’t tell the others.” His voice was quiet, to the point where Makoto had to strain her ears just to hear it.

“... It’s the Hanahaki Disease, isn’t it..?” Makoto asked, not wanting to commit anything just yet. Akira just wordlessly nodded. “... Who is it?” She wondered.

“...Huh? What are you talking about?” Morgana asked, Makoto blinking in a bit of surprise.

“Do you not know how one gets the disease? Were you never told..?”

“... No, I just… thought it was something in the air, like a strand of the flu or something..” Morgana frowned, “Was I wrong..?”

“No one really knows how it spreads, as there has been evidence that it could do so through multiple ways. However, just because you have it doesn’t mean that you will show signs. You only start coughing up flower petals when you fall in love with someone, and you feel as if the one you love cannot or does not love you back without a doubt.” Makoto explained briefly to Morgana, who nodded.

“Right… So, that means, Akira actually likes someone!?” Morgana yowled loudly, earning a hiss from Akira,

“ _Quiet down!_ ” After a quick ‘ _sorry!_ ’ from Morgana, Akira sighed, rubbing the side of his head tiredly. “Yeah… I like someone, but that doesn’t matter…” He huffed slightly.

“You won’t even tell us..?” Makoto frowned at their leader, “Why? We can try to see if she really does like you.” Akira shook his head immediately.

“No. She… She likes someone else. I’d rather not…” Akira turned his head, coughing into the crook of his arm, “... I’d rather die later than sooner.” Makoto blinked.

“You’re not getting the surgery done..? Why..!?”

“That surgery takes a long time to recover from. If something comes up…” Akira trailed off, Makoto nodding in understanding.

“... If that’s the case, I could be the substitute leader for as long as you need me to be.” She offered, making Akira frown.

“No, no, that’s fine… You don’t have to-”

“Is there another reason why you cannot participate in the surgery?” She interrogated him once more, seeing Akira frown. “... Does it have to do with the fact you would be forgetting who you love?” Akira was silent, confirming her suspicions.

“... I’m going to take these petals to Takemi.” Akira announced after a collective silence, gathering the petals with Makoto’s and Morgana’s help.

“I would like to join you.” Makoto told Akira with a smile, “Besides, I’d like to get to know the doctor who has been supplying us with medicine that literally save our lives in the Metaverse.” Akira hesitantly nodded, standing and putting the baggie in his bag. “...I’ll be back, Morgana.”

“Yeah yeah, I know… Be careful, alright?” Morgana frowned at the other two.

  
  
  
  
“..I am hesitant to believe that you would put your life in such a danger because of sentimental reasons.” Makoto started as they walked towards the clinic. “So, due to that reasoning, I can only imagine that the one you like is part of the Phantom Thieves. If you suddenly forgot one of them, it’d be plainly obvious to everyone that knows you. It would also put everyone in danger in the Metaverse, if you could not make the right moves because of that one person. Am I right?” Akira stayed silent. “... I will be taking that as a yes. This started some time before I even talked to you, so I know it’s not me. The only other girl in the group is Ann, but… She doesn’t seem to be your type, hmm?”

“... What are you getting at?” Akira mumbled, refusing to look towards Makoto. “If you say Ann isn’t an option, then who is?”

“... Those flowers.”

“-Hm?” Akira looked over in confusion.

“I remember reading a Flowerpedia a while ago, and if I’m correct, those are Gardenia flower petals.” She pointed out. “The flower that means ‘secret’ or ‘forbidden love’.” She smiled over at Akira. “If we go on the suspicions that I am correct, that means you love either Ryuji or Yusuke.”

“Ah- no, that’s-”

“Do not try to hold the facts from me, Akira.” Makoto warned, “The sooner you’re able to admit it, the sooner that we may be able to help you.”

“You know how this society is, regarding the LGBT community.” Akira hissed at Makoto, “Even if I did like one of them- _if_ \- I would never tell them. You know why? People would give them even more shit than they deserve now, without having that label on them.” His comment made Makoto frown sadly.

“I… I know.”

“So, please, don’t tell anyone, okay?” Akira asked her, pleading with his eyes, “I don’t want them to worry even more.”

“... That depends.” Makoto hardened her stare once more. “.. How long are you expected to live, if this keeps up?”

“-... well…” Akira frowned even more as Makoto’s scowl grew.

“Kurusu..!” Her warning tone bled through, causing Akira to wince.

“... She… She’s not expecting me to make it through the summer…”

“Akira!” She herself jumped at how loud her voice was before quickly quieting down. “I cannot allow this! Both as your friend and the second-in-command. You-”

“Just give it up.” Akira interrupted her, “Besides, even if it was accepted in Japan, I would never confess to him. He obviously doesn’t ‘swing that way’. I’d rather live as long as I can than confess and die immediately.” He huffed, walking up the stairs of the clinic, “Well, here you go. You want to meet her, go ahead.” He stated before opening the door and walking in. Makoto could only sigh worriedly before she forced her feet up the stairs to join their leader.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I've been having trouble with this story... I may need to require help from someone with my inspiration, so I'm probably going to just work on my other story, Unmei no tenkan, seeing as that one is a lot more developed than this one.. I'm sorry >.>;


	5. Hazādo

**July 21, 20XX**

  
Akira was in class, boredly listening to the lectures that Mr. Ushimaru was droning on and on about, trying not to get too lost in thought, lest he get hit in the head from a stray piece of chalk once again. His head still hurt from last time…. He couldn’t help it, though, his mind wandering to the day before. He had gotten messages from an unknown account that called themselves ‘Alibaba’. Somehow, he knew that he was a phantom thief. He also requested that a change of heart be made on someone, but Alibaba wouldn’t tell him _who_ he wanted the change of heart to be for… And no matter how many times he tried to contact Alibaba back, the message wouldn’t be sent. He recalled last night, worriedly pacing around his room and Morgana worriedly telling him to sit down and just _relax_ , but he couldn’t, he was too anxious because if Alibaba was able to tell who they were, then who’s to say that nobody else would..? These thoughts repeated in his head once again in class as he stared at his notes. This was only interrupted by the buzz of his phone, making Morgana and him perk up slightly. Akira glanced up at Ushimaru to make sure that he was busy writing on the chalkboard.

“Who is it?” Morgana asked quietly. Akira just sighed, looking annoyed as he let Morgana see his phone as well.

**RS >> Did Alibaba message you?**

Morgana sighed as well, “It’s just Ryuji…” Akira watched as Ryuji told him to message the group when Alibaba messaged him again. _’Like I didn’t already know that, Ryuji… Thanks…’_

  
  
  
It wasn’t until the afternoon when he was messaged by Alibaba. He ignored Morgana’s comments as he answered.

**AB >> Good day. **  
**Good day to you too. << AK **  
**AB >> Ah, you responded today. That’s good.**  
**AB >> I need to talk to you about something. **  
**Hit me. << AK**  
**AB >> I would like to be sure of one thing.**  
**AB >> You are the leader of the Phantom Thieves, correct.**

Akira resisted the urge to click his tongue, looking up at Ushimaru and confirming that he was alright to continue on.

**You got the wrong dude. << AK **  
**AB >> No I do not. **  
**AB >> You, Akira Kurusu, are the leader of the Phantom Thieves. **  
**What proof do you have? << AK**  
**AB >> I don’t exactly have any so-called ‘proof’**  
**AB >> But I will have you know that I know something very few others know about you.**

Akira frowned at that comment.

**What is this ‘something’? << AK**  
**AB >> This ‘something’ is a disease you have.**  
**AB >> It is called the ‘Hanahaki Disease’, is it not?**  
**How do you know about that? << AK**  
**AB >> So you aren’t denying it.**  
**AB >> I also know who you like. **  
**AB >> It’s your artist friend, is it not?**  
**What the hell << AK**  
**AB >> This conversation has been dragging on for far too long.**

  
  
  
Akira frowned at the messages that were on his phone. He had just agreed to steal the heart of a girl named ‘Futaba Sakura’. He was uncertain about it, not knowing if this really would be the right thing.. But he knew that if any of the others found out, they would pressure him, and he’d die in an explosion of flowers, and that would be the end of the Phantom Thieves. He sighs and stands up, as class had ended just a few minutes ago. He picked up his bag with Morgana and slung it over his shoulders and is about to leave, but as luck would find it, he was stopped.

“Oh, Kurusu.” He blinked in confusion as his homeroom teacher, Ms. Kawakami approached him, “I’m glad I could catch you before you left… I would like to speak to you, so would you stay a bit after?”

“Oh, uh.. Sure?” Akira frowned as he heard the people around him speaking.

> _”Oooh, what did Kurusu-kun do?”_

> _”I dunno, but it’s gotta be something bad, right?”_

“Quiet down.” Kawakami looked over to the other students, looking annoyed, “Just go home, okay? And Kurusu did nothing wrong, I just need to talk to him.” She crossed her arms, looking serious. The other students grumbled about ‘how Kawakami is suddenly more involved’ and ‘why is that?’. They wait until everyone has left except him.

  
Kawakami leaned on her desk casually as she looked over at Akira expectedly without saying a word.  
“Won’t you tell me what’s going on?” Kawakami frowned, “You know I’m here for you, right? You’ve been looking really pale lately. I can’t tell if it’s from stress or if you are actually sick… Sometimes, there isn’t really a difference..” She explained.

“Oh.. I’m just fine, Ms. Kawakami…” Akira stated before stepping back as Kawakami leaned towards him, her eyes narrowed in a glare.

“Kurusu… You think I don’t have a brain?” She lowered her voice, “I can tell that your health is deteriorating. As your teacher and trusted friend, I need to know what’s going on with you. I don’t want to see you suffer.” She leaned back to where she wasn’t threatening Akira’s personal space, but kept eye contact.

“.... Thanks, but…” Kawakami sent another glare at Akira, warning him to not lie to her. “.... Even if I do tell you what’s wrong, you’re not going to be able to fix it.” He put his hands in his pockets as he frowned.

“I would at least like to know, so that if something goes wrong, I can at least try my best to ease the pain off you. And you can always talk to me about whatever it is.” Kawakami frowned.

“... I appreciate you worrying about me, Ms. Kawakami... But everything’s going to be all right in the end…”

“... Is this a sickness that you can die from?” Akira widened his eyes at her question before forcing himself to untense.

“No, I’ll be alright. I should probably go though, I need to meet up with my friends…” Akira didn’t need look up in Kawakami’s eyes to know that she was worried sick about him even more now, knowing she saw through him like an open book. He ignored that, though, and went out of the classroom.

“What was that about?” Morgana asked him as they exited the school. Akira just shook his head.

“Don’t worry about it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that this is pretty short, but I just have been having a hard time with this story.. And I wanted to update _sometime_ soon...That's why I'm updating both stories today...


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